Well it has certainly been a long time since I've been on here. I think it is because I have been SO busy with everything going on our here, and also because my subscription ran out. I am too poor to buy it and my parents procrastinate. Well hey, at least their willing to.

It is deffinately the first snow of the season. Walking from Choir to Government reaveled this to me. I walked next to some window and joy shot through me. At the same time, this is a bad thing. I am not ready to give up the warmth of the sun or the sun-kissed glow to my skin. I am not ready to surrender to the blasts of wind with spears of ice in them. But most of all, I am not ready to give up the comfort of feeling at ease for the season I hate the most.

Needless to say, I have changed a lot in the past months and most certainly have matured. I am off to college at the end of this school year and my life will be getting started. Am I ready for this? In all honesty, this scares the hell out of me. In the past year I have made bad descisions and screwed up my life beyond repair, or so I thought. The one thing about a family's love is that they will love you unconditionally no matter how much you let them down. Still doesnt make it any easier though. Problems at home, I have learned, should not stop you from living, or wanting to live.

I just realized that my last update was in May. Wow. I mean I know it wasnt all that long ago, but it does feel like it. So much has happened since then. I feel like it was 10 years ago.


Lets hope the next few months give me fun times with friends, a new boyfriend, and the ability to let go.


~Jay


PS- Mrs. Grish, my HTML teacher says hi, LOL